I don’t get butt workouts. You want to work out your butt. You noticed another woman’s butt was tone and less jiggly and now you want a tone, less jiggly butt too.
So you’ve bookmarked some workouts that specifically target your butt and you have made it your goal to achieve the tone butt you have in mind.
Humans are so weird. Why have we spent any time at all studying other people’s butts and deciding what it is we can do to make our own butts more attractive? They’re BUTTS. Flabby, meaty, fleshy backsides we sit on. But somehow we have determined that a firmer fleshy backside is more attractive than a flabby one. We don’t want our backsides to jiggle, no thank you!
We’re willing to contort our bodies into awkward positions so that we can repetitiously move our legs in ways that will somehow stretch and strengthen muscles beneath the flab that otherwise do not get moved. The fact that we might get on all fours and lift our legs like dogs on fire hydrants over and over and over again in order to achieve that maximum firmness further confirms my belief that these body parts were never really intended to be rock hard. Butts are supposed to be squishy.
How do we have time in life to concern ourselves with butt exercises? If you strip every butt naked that you ever did see…firm or flabby…they’re all still pretty ugly if you ask me.
So stop it butt worker-outers. You’re making us squishy people look bad.
Andrea says
You know, I never thought about it before, but you’re right. Butts are supposed to be flabby and squishy. If they were supposed to be hard they would be called rocks. And I’d rather sit on a soft squishy pillow than a hard rock any day.
Kat says
Yes, it’s more comfortable. THAT’S why we keep them this way!
Marta says
YES! I am much more cozy sitting on my squishy butt than I imagine someone with one of those toned buttworker-outers butts could ever be!
Kat says
Those people must be in a constant state of pain when they’re sitting.
Marta says
I kind of feel bad for them actually. They have to exercise AND their uncomfortable!
twisterfish says
Thank you! I’m so glad I’m not the only one that thinks this way.
Tiffany says
I am totally obsessed with butt workouts…what’s wrong with me??
Rachee says
I am obsessed too. I have a bunch of pins on Pinterest full of butt exercises. Mine is squishy and jiggly. I want a firm squish.
Yes. That was TMI
Kat says
A firm squish. Haha! That was beautifully put.
Jen says
That last line says it all… yes, stop making the squishy people look bad.
Kat says
It’s just so selfish. What about us!?!
Jenn says
I so love this! I don’t get the butt obsession either. Honestly, I wish I had some jiggly butt fat to fill in my pants. I have a flat butt and my pants always fall off and sometimes sitting on my boney butt actually hurts :( I’d be thrilled with something squishy so that it didn’t look like I was wearing a diaper under my pants!