My mop disappeared.
Just flat out disappeared.
We have a closet that holds the mop, but it’s not in the mop closet and it’s not ANYWHERE.
I even searched the garage and it’s definitely not in there. I have a broken one in there and Pat was all, “just see if that one works.”
And I was all, “It DOESN’T work! It just blinks and does nothing. I put it in there months ago and bought my new one and now my new one is just gone. Gone! How does a mop disappear?”
And when Pat did not do an adequate job of caring about my missing mop I said, “So my mop is nowhere, that’s just fine! I’ll head out to the store and drop another hundred dollars on yet ANOTHER mop!”
Because even though Pat doesn’t care about mops, he does care about dropping another hundred dollars on anything. I know him too well.
And I go through mops faster than the average person. My Mom introduced the idea of these handy lightweight steam cleaners and the two of us could have our own QVC show with the multiple conversations we have had dedicated entirely to which mop we’re currently using, which mop we’re replacing, and which mop we might recommend next.
My first mop was amazing, but it snapped in half because I’m a little too aggressive with my floor cleaning.
The next mop was heavy and hard to push. The mop after that had a cord that was too short. The mop after that got my floors too wet. The mop after that, not wet enough. The mop in the garage would turn on, but blinked and did nothing.
And now I have a mop that is nowhere.
I brought the broken one back in the house and plugged it in to show my husband that indeed it just blinks and does nothing.
“See. It’s broken.”
And then I continued searching for my lost mop. Did I lend it to someone? Was it upstairs in a bathroom? Was it in a forgotten corner? Did I stuff it beneath the kitchen sink? Did the SPIRITS TAKE IT?
I went back to the broken mop I had plugged in and noticed it had stopped blinking. And then I remembered how it would blink while it warmed up and when it stopped blinking you could choose a setting and mop your floor.
I chose a setting.
It worked.
I mopped the floor.
Pat came down and was all, “what happened?”
And I was all, “I fixed it. My other mop just straight up disappeared, but I was able to fix this one, see!”
As he headed back up the stairs I heard him mumble, “You didn’t fix it, you just forgot how to turn it on…”
But I just blinked and did nothing.
He knows me too well.
Stefanie says
Has your mom been over lately?
Mama Kat says
She totally stole it!
Dyanne @ I Want Backsies says
I have one of those fancy, plug-in mops. It has the words “Vac Steam” on it and sits at the top of my basement stairs. Every single time I walk up the basement stairs (which is often, as my laundry room and pantry are down there), I look at it and see “VAG Steam” and wonder who would want to steam a vagina? Wouldn’t you think I’d catch on after a few years of owning it?
Mama Kat says
I definitely need a Vag Steam…I’d never lose something with a name like that.