1.) A mom fail moment.
I promised myself I would never blog about this.
I was beyond upset with myself.
It started with my four year old.
It ALWAYS starts with my four year old.
Okay that’s not fair to him…it usually starts with my four year old.
On this particular day everything was sending him into a tantrum.
Example:
He wants milk…no not that cup the blue cup, the blue cup THE BLUE CUP!!
Come on Buddy you can ask nicer than that…there’s no need to scream…
BLUE CUP!!!!! NOOOOO!!!! BLUE CUP!!!!!
I’m getting you the blue cup Bud, just calm down.
BLUUUUEEEE!!!!!!
God mother of freaking all I’m getting the blue cup!
I mean the red cup!
We had been going through scenarios like that all day. I was fed up and desperately looking forward to nap time.
Nap time means a break from kids. Nap time means work gets done. Nap time means time to get back on track after whatever derailed me that morning.
Only instead of napping he was crying, kicking his door, yelling and hiding. I was relieved that the conference call I was on was not a video Skype call. I would have been mortified if the receivers had seen my red face and devilish child.
When the call ended I was seething with rage and rushed up the stairs one final time. Not only did he NEED that nap, disrupt my call and damage a door, but he was single handedly waking every other child in the house and I needed a break from all of them.
“YOU WILL GET. IN. YOUR. BED AND YOU. WILL. SLEEEP!!”
To which he responded with more screaming.
He needed to go potty. FINE GO POTTY.
He needed his blanket. GET YOUR BLANKET!
He needed his fan on. IT’S ON!
He needed water. ENOUGH! YOU DON’T NEED WATER!!
To which he responded with more screaming.
FINE!
I marched to the bathroom to fill a glass with water, stay calm stay calm stay calm…boy I wish I listened to that inner voice every once in awhile.
Here! Drink your water.
NO! I don’t WANT water!!!
Stay calm stay calm stay calm.
You said you wanted water…take a drink and go to bed!
I DON’T WANT IT!!!! he screeched.
I had passed my limit.
He’d pushed me too far for too long and I was already breaking under too much stress and not enough sleep.
I took the large glass of water and dumped it directly over his head.
He screamed like a girl.
I’m sure the shock of cold water dripping down his face was the last thing he expected.
I stormed out of his room and found my usual “pull yourself together” spot on the stairs where I cried for about five minutes as I replayed the new low I had stooped to.
And now it’s a regular threat. “Do you want me to get the water!?! Okay then…lay down and go to sleep.”