You know when something bad happens and you walk around with a pit in your stomach and you keep having to ask yourself what is wrong and then you keep remembering the thing that put the pit in your stomach to begin with?
I am so BUMMED that Whitney Houston died this weekend. SO bummed. I’m not normally affected by the loss of famous people, much less people who struggle with drug addictions. But Whitney??
Like many 14 year old girls I sat in front of my mirror before school every morning and blasted Whitney. I thought I had unlocked the secret to an amazing voice with my brush in one hand, hair spray in the other:
Sing. Louder.
And so I did. I screamed her songs. It was the training I needed.
I’d lay on the floor with All At Once playing on repeat and I’d think about how it spoke to me. Leave it to a 14 year old girl to take lyrics meant for lovers and twist them into a painful ballad of longing for her deceased father. That song was a chord striker for me. Still is.
I’ve been whining to my husband all weekend…”I just can’t belieeeve she’s gone! I really thought she was going to beat her addiction and make a comeback. There was good music left in her. She had such potential when she hit the music scene…I just hate that it had to end like this…poor poor Bobbi Christina!”
Pat ignored me because apparently he never listened to Whitney on repeat while laying on his bedroom floor as a teen. He’s just not as distraught as I think he should be.
Last night as I cooked dinner I screamed my rendition of Saving All My Love, “Cause toNIGHT is the NIGHT for feeeelin’ all RIGHT. We’ll be making love the WHOLE NIGHT THROUUUUGH!! So I’m savin’ all my love…yeah I’m savin’ all my love….yes I’m SAVING ALL MY LOVE for YOUUUUUUU…”
And then I turned to Pat…the 14 year old still hopeful her scream singing is doing something good.
“Pat do I sound kind of good???” and Pat was all “No.” and I was all “No I mean, obviously I’m no Whitney but do I sound okaaay??” and he, seeing the hope in my eyes, was all “Yeah I guess” and I, wanting to hear more, was all “REALLY? Like…do you think I could make it to Hollywood? I mean obviously I could never win American Idol…but could I make it to Hollywood?” and he was all “I think there are 2 or 3 stages of tryouts before contestants make it in front of the judges. In the preliminary rounds they weed out the mediocre singers and just put people on TV who are really good or will make good TV and then they move them to Hollywood.” and I was all “and you think I would make it tooooo…???” and he was all “maybe the second stage of preliminary rounds” and I was all “WELL HOT DAMN!!! I KNEW I HAD TALENT!!!”
I guess that training really did pay off.
Thank you Whitney.
Gin says
I too sang and danced to Whitney but I was 7 and had no idea what it meant to “feel the heat with somebody.” So, I asked my my mom. After that, Whitney wasn’t played in our house. Lame.
Mama Kat says
Hahaha! If you just would have kept your mouth shut you could have learned to feel the heat on your own! Kids just have to be so inquisitive.
Jessica says
I thought I sounded so good singing “The Greatest Love of All” after much overanalyzing I think it was just because Whitney’s voice was so good that she completely drowned mine out. I spent many, many days rewinding her songs over and over in my pink boombox. So sad to see such talent gone way too soon.
Mama Kat says
Oh that’s exactly what it was…when our voices are accompanying Whitney you just can’t hear us at all. So we sound AWESOME.
Jennifer says
I’m pretty sure all women that are in their 20’s, 30’s, and 40’s are feeling that loss. What happened to her is very sad, but a great lesson that we can use to teach our kids the dangers of drugs.
Mama Kat says
Until that autopsy comes back I’m just not willing to believe Whitney’s cause of death is drug related. SAY IT AIN’T SO!
Gina says
“I Will Always Love You” is a song with huge meaning to me and I’ll never get to hear her sing it live again. Sad ending to a life that held so much promise for years to come. Destruction of the body is devastating. She was two years younger than me and that’s scary!
Mama Kat says
I know! She is SO young!!
Jen says
I was convinced that I could sing just as good if not better than Whitney.
Don’t worry, I was given a reality check soon enough.
Mama Kat says
Hopefully your reality check came privately and not on center stage at a school talent show.
lisleman says
I enjoyed your story. I can’t relate to singing Whitney stuff but I have howled out other stuff. I once thought after practicing with a karoke machine that I could sing “Smoke in your eyes”. (who was blowing smoke with that one?) However I can relate to applying a song to a different type of personal experience.
Connie Weiss says
I can’t believe it either.
Her music was a HUGE part of my teen years.
Tiffany Barry says
I’m already listening to her music with Netflix set to deliver The Bodyguard tomorrow…
I do have to say that I’m not surprised. It’s tragic, but we all knew what she was getting into, and there aren’t a lot of life options once you’re on that road. Rehab or Death. It’s unfortunate that the latter is the path she put herself on.
I wonder how all those who enabled it or stood by and did nothing slept last night.
On the other hand… only the autopsy will reveal what really happened. I did find it kind of funny that Twitter broke the news before any type of press statement could be released.
Jenni Chiu says
Second stage preliminary round? Damn- that’s better than I’d ever do.
I too am bummed about Whitney.
A serious piece of my childhood.
PS- Don’t tell, but I totally loved The Bodyguard. I just knew that someday I would be famous and fall in love with mine too.
Tiffany Barry says
Yay! I’m glad I’m not alone in my bodyguard fantasies, lol!
Jennifer says
I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS!!
Tonya says
I love this.
I wrote a similar post today and included a video of my two year old dancing to Whitney with his aunt.
RIP WH.
meleah rebeccah says
So very sad about Whitney Houston. She was too young to die and so freaking talented. All of her songs have touched me in one way or another. In fact, her songs are the soundtrack to half of my childhood memories.
Loukia says
Hey… I was so upset when I heard she has passed away, too. I blogged about it, too, today. Actually I finished my blog post at like 1 a.m. last night because there was so much I wanted to say. I too talked about singing into my hair brush. SIGH.
Trish says
I am feeling the same way about Whitney. I just can’t believe she is gone. I think I was in denial about her drug problems. Michael Jackson’s death didn’t stun me this much. Or make me as sad.
Making It Work Mom says
I can’t believe people who say they weren’t surprised by her death. I was stunned! Like you I believed she still had a comeback in her.
I was watching some of the footage yesterday and was overwhelmed at how beautiful she was in her heyday. I had forgotten that part.
My song was How Will I Know. Taught me everything I needed to know about love.
Jodi says
I am so sad about Ms. Whitney as well. i cried when I watched the Grammy’s last night. She was soooo young and so talented. It’s just a huge waste and tragedy all the way around. My heart really goes out to her family. What a great post Mama Kat.
Jess Out West says
I have been really horrified by how mean people are being about this across bloggolandia and general media. She was phenomenal! Yes, terrible marriage and drug problems but didn’t we all want to see her pull it around? Noooobody liked train-wreck Whitney. It felt uncomfortable seeing her fail (unlike the Lohans or the Winehouse who seemed to court disaster and speculation). With Whitney it just seemed sad. We wanted her to be back on her feet. I am sad with you and getting out my hairbrush. ANDIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEIIIIIIII (gasp) WILLLLALWAYSLOVEE (gasp) EEE YOUOOOOOOOOOEEEEOOOUUUU!
Mama and the City says
I love your word: bloggolandia! YEAH
BalancingMama (Julie) says
First “grown up” record album I ever owned was Whitney. Sigh.
You know she’s in a movie coming out this summer, right? One more Whitney fix. Wonder if she sings in it?
Mama and the City says
It shocked me her death too. But sometimes it’s hard for me to treat celebrities in a special way considering there are lots of talented people in their exact same shoes, poor and unknown to us. I guess I am cold hearted lately that I do not feel bad for *them*. Even if her autopsy reveals natural causes, it would be hard for me to believe all her self-destructive behavior in her life wasn’t a factor for her death. Sigh.
I’m content I did not get hooked to her music when young, otherwise it would have made it hard to resist the crying.
Rachel says
Crazy. Just crazy. I have been kind of walking around going, “no way.” Doesn’t make any sense and feels like we’ve been gypped out of some amazing person.
I didn’t quite get around to scream singing (us deaf people have to draw the line somewhere), but who one earth DIDN’T want to be Whitney?
Cottage By The Sea says
So sad on so many levels. But if there is a silver lining, I’ve heard her daughter sing and I think she may carry on her moms legacy. There will never be anyone better than Whitney tho. Well, maybe Mama Kat.
Aimee Giese | Greeblemonkey says
I was devastated and her stuff wasn’t even my style. Such a special voice.